It seems I may be experiencing a Mid-Life Crisis. I capitalize it as it can be a title that someone carries, I believe. Some of us have them and some of us don't. As a woman, I believe my crisis looks quite a bit different than the film version that men are stereo-typically thought to have. I am not going to run out and get a Porsche. I am not going to get a boyfriend. I am not going to quit my job (yet, anyway). But I do want to focus on being better. And stop thinking about things that do not serve me.
For instance, I have been singled out at work by two folks whose team I am no part of. I stay awake at night thinking about them and the fact that they want to make me miserable. They don't like me because I am cheerful and happy, positive and friendly, motivated and professional. It doesn't behoove me to think of their disdain for me. Instead, I should be thinking of my wants, my desires, my comfort and my health and how I want to improve my standing. I should be considering what my parents think of me and whether my husband is proud of me rather than even referring to sneers from unprofessional, unhappy people in my mundane, very un-creative job.
On January 5, 2015, my friend Clark introduced me to a book called,
"Your Best Year Yet" by Karen Ann Kennedy. I bought it and while I haven't been super structured with it (because inflexibility doesn't serve me), I have gotten a journal and I do read the book as I would any daily devotional, because that is what it is.
What I am trying to be structured in is eating to be healthy and serving food to my husband that encourages him to be healthy as well. I want to re-commit to my yoga practice and (thankfully) have found
a new studio to call home and try to meditate and pray for health, self-control, forgiveness and letting go of resentment. And, I want to not only be positive, because that is my nature, but in fact, take that giant leap even further and instead of floating on pink clouds and simply being a dreamer, become the do-er I know I am. The blogs I read (the short list),
Regina's here and
Lori's here, remind me that I am worthy to have all my desires met; all my goals achieved.
And so I looked for more reference materials on how I really can make this year the best yet and continue in subsequent years to do the same for myself and my family. The list I found is from
Time Magazine's online Psychology Section. The article is called
"The Ten Best Self-Help Books You've (Probably) Never Heard Of." One of the books listed was published in 1869. I think the list is worth some research. To accompany Karen's book, I also ordered
"It Works" by RHJ. It's $2.99 and worth every cent.
 |
| Self Mastery Through Conscious Autosuggestion by Emile Coue - 1869. |
